Transcription

[[The bearded janitor surreptitiously enters a supply closet. In the background two police officers appear to be deep in conversation, their backs turned to the janitor and the reader.]]

[[Inside the closet the janitor pushes his mop and bucket to one side, then takes something off a nearby shelf. There is a sink in the foreground.]]
Janitor: Welp, ain't no time like th' present. Might as well get this chore over with.

[[He unrolls the bundle to reveal a pair of scissors, a disposable razor, a can of shaving cream, and a gun.]]
Janitor: Got no plan. Haven't had one fer... how many years now? Been wingin' it ever since. But there's my ticket out o' here, lyin' right in front o' me. Gotta grab it an' see where it leads.
[[He opens the bundle, revealing (from left to right) a pair of scissors, a screwlike object, a small bottle (or perhaps flashlight), and a miniature gun.]]

[[He faces the mirror and we peer over his shoulder as he begins to cut his beard with the scissors.]]
Janitor: An' gotta drop this dang accent. Not sure where it came from, but it's served it's purpose. Ain't gonna fly if'n I'm gonna make this scheme work.